Molly’s left front leg is being amputated on Monday. It’s been a really rough few weeks for all of us here. But it’s either the leg or her life. I seem to be accepting it a lot better than my husband, Brad, and I wonder a little if it’s because I’m a mother. I don’t know. But I do know that once I got my head around it, and grieved for her, for the leg she is going to lose, I went into caregiver mode.
We took her in for her chest x-rays yesterday, and they came back clean … so far. It may be too small to see so we have to check her again in a few months. But the vet took the bandage off from where he took samples of the mass for biopsy, and it was a mess. The incision never healed, and the cancer mass was through the skin … it looked awful. I said to Brad, “If you had any doubts before about amputation being the right thing to do, this should get rid of them all.”
I’m at a stage now where I just want it over with. Take the leg, and let’s get her adapting so we can move forward. I’m ready for it.
I had my husband, and my sons, read all the comments on my posts … it helped. I could tell by the way my husband turned his head so I couldn’t see the tears. They’ve been pretty frequent with all of us these last few days. I have the advantage of being a woman, and can wail to my heart’s content. My two teenaged sons and my husband try to hold it in. It’s not working, but they still try to hold it in.
I never thought anything like this would be so sad. I’ve owned animals, all kinds, all my life … nursed them through all kinds of ailments, mourned when they died, and yet never would have imagined that the thought of one of them losing a limb would put me into a strange state of grief. Who knew?
I’m glad you’re feeling better. I’m sure after reading things on here you already have a feeling about this, but if your husband and sons have any reservations about this surgery, the next two weeks are only going to make it worse for them. It’s going to be up to you to stay strong for Molly. My husband didn’t feel good about the amputation before hand, then during her recovery he became very angry. It was incredibly difficult for him to handle. Hopefully your husband won’t react the same way, but maybe brace yourself just in case. Ok, enough of the “hold one” type stuff.
We’re all here for you whenever you need someplace to go. We wish you and Molly the best of luck and will be praying for her quick recovery!
Leslie, Roxy’s Mom
Hi Molly’s Mom,
Try to hang in there… Like Roxy’s Mom said… the next 2 weeks will be difficult… You, your family and Molly will have some adjusting to do… and don’t forget… it’s a big surgery too… so there’s the recovery from that.
And if you do feel the need to cry, try not to do it in front of Molly… I remember that I would cry in my car all the way to work or to the store and back… and as soon as I’d pull into the garage, I’d take a deep breath and put on my happy face. My Jake was not going to see me sad and upset! He might think it’s something he did…
But you will all get through this… and if you need to vent, you know where to go!! 🙂
Angel Jake and Wolfie’s Mom
Hi Leslie … luckily my boys trust me enough with animals to trust that the decision is the best for the pet. I’m not so concerned about them. And even though this was a joint decision, between the two of us, I have a feeling my husband will react like yours did. He knows it’s the right thing but I guess this is why, when our kids get hurt, they run to us … and trip over their fathers to get to us … lol. I’m glad he went with me to the vet’s, for the chest xray and for the vet to check the incision area. It was shocking, how raw it looked. Molly has been bouncing along like there is nothing wrong since the vet took the pieces to biopsy. He was amazed she was so active, given the state of the cancer mass. It just shows how they hide it … but it confirmed we were making the right decision. However, I agree … one of us is going to have to get everyone else through this … then when she’s okay, and everyone has adapted, I’ll fall apart and maybe go on a trip or something … 🙂
I think we women do carry the burden of stuff like this more often than men because we can wail and weep whenever we want to … nice cleansing tears. Tears aren’t a weakness. They’re a survival skill we learn at an early age. Men can till the soil and we will tend the hearth wailing and weaping and multi-tasking while we carry tissues in our pockets. then go out and run a company the next day … lol. I’m kidding. No offense, guys.
And … I have had the support from people like you and the others who have commented. Sure, I read them and cry more but they are strength tears. They touch my heart. And I’ll pass it all on to Molly to help her get through this.
You know, I never thought of that. She gets concerned when I cry … and she comes right over to me, like it’s something she has to do, trying to lick my face and leans into me, like it’s her job to make me feel better. Like I’m her puppy. If she can’t then it’s just going to add to her misery. Very good point … thanks.
We’ll be thinking of Molly Monday. Best wishes for a perfect procedure and speedy recovery!
Awwww….I grew up with a Border Terrier. A rare breed in the states, but such a loving, sweet one. And if she’s anything like my Daisy was, fiesty too. Something tells me that three legs is not going to slow Molly down.
I know not everyone’s experience is the same as ours, but our tripawd Zoe was actually in less pain after the surgery than before. Yes, the first couple of weeks were the hardest, but not nearly as hard as the decision-making beforehand.
I will certainly be thinking of little Molly tomorrow.
paws crossed for success on monday, and rapid healing for molly. i agree with angel jake’s mom – your emotions set the tone for molly’s recovery. she probably knows you better than any of the guys in your house, right?? once the pain is gone, she will adapt very quickly – gayle still amazes us every day with her ‘can do’ attitude. getting through the next two ‘hell weeks’ will be challenging, but sounds like you guys are up to it!! blessings coming your way!!
charon & gayle